“How do you get rid of a hot tub?” You know, the plastic mini swimming pool that you couldn’t wait to get into and rid your old body’s aches and pain’s; the one that you spent your children’s inheritance convincing your wife that it was truly needed. We had spent some time discussing the necessity of the purchase.
“It’s for the kids,” I kept saying. “The children are too young to have a dangerous water device in our backyard,” Lorraine had mentioned. I’ll admit it wasn’t the sort of thing you start throwing money around just to spoil ourselves, but we had moved into our own home and we were pretty sure that if we gave up my motorcycle we could just about make the payments.
“I’ll never allow them into the tub without you or me being present,” I stated with my fingers crossed behind my back. “Just think how much fun the boys will have. They will be the coolest kids on the block.” I had read somewhere that if you cross your fingers behind your back, the next thing you say must be true. “No, I really did read that somewhere,” I said with my tongue pushing out my cheek.
At this time we could probably afford an old bathtub someone had thrown away, but we couldn’t find one of those. Besides, the salesman that kept rubbing his hands together had convinced us that the payments wouldn’t send us to the poor house.
We probably could afford an old bathtub, but when you are young and silly you will find that your health will improve. At least that’s what the snickering salesman told us. It was my entire fault from then on. I did discuss the purchase with my bride, but we had just moved into our new home and so the only real discussion was what color we would buy. Believe it or not, they had a blue tub the same color as our new home. Isn’t it a small miracle when something like that happens?
I’ll admit I was really giddy the day the delivery man wheeled the savior of my aches and pains into our backyard. Lorraine even started getting with the idea of spending money we didn’t have. Of course, she got to pick the color and size of the new tub, and I had to promise that no children were allowed in the tub unless an adult was present. That lasted about a week before we could hear them splashing and having such a good time. Besides, we convinced ourselves that since we bought the heaviest cover they sold, that we were probably overreacting. We would always hear the kids, and who is going to be the first grownup to tell the kids they have to get out of the water now?
Why do you ask? Why am I telling you about this piece of Worthy history? I am writing this to see if someone has a way to cut the top of the tub because it is a little over six-inches thick and none of my many tools can cut through the top. So now I have a top that I can’t cut through or the rest of the tub and I don’t know what I am going to do. I don’t know for sure, but I’ll bet I can’t get rid of it by taking it to the dump. Oh wait, I have been told otherwise, but I still have to cut it up.
So, now I am in a quandary. If you have a secret about how to get rid of the top and the frame, I would sure be happy if you could drop a line to my email below with your ideas. Of course, I’m not really upset about all the rules that we have about how to rid of unwanted items. And no! You can’t count in-laws. We do have rules.
Besides, Gonzales actually has a day or two coming up next Saturday and Sunday, Oct. 18 and 19, for you to get rid of unwanted items. You don’t even have to carry your items up to the dump site. You just take them to Fairview Middle School and the volunteers will even help you unload. But I have been told that the hot tub will not qualify. So, here we are, back where we started. Maybe we can get a new one and then they will take it away. Hmm, or maybe my boys can help me. But one is working on his new house and the other one is working on getting new clients.
It sure seems that I am getting to the time in my life where it’s time to get rid of something else. First the Audi, now the hot tub. What’s next? I will say there are some things I would love to do away with. As much as I have embraced new technologies and innovations, I sometimes worry about future generations. I know they will be fine. That’s what every younger generation tells their predecessors. But will they? I remember when cell phones came along and how excited I was. But then it was Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, now X, etc. … When did we stop talking to each other? I even find myself saying, “Oh I’ll just text, that way I don’t have to talk.” I worry about how much fun it is to banter back and forth, to talk to an old friend just to see how they are doing. When did we decide it was better to sit behind a keyboard and bully someone who we thought were our friends?
So, the next time you decide that you want to sit behind the computer and criticize, why not make the call — and maybe you can tell me how to get rid of my hot tub.
God Bless.
